I’ve fallen out of some good habits in recent years.
(Doesn’t it sound so much nicer to say that instead of “I’ve fallen into some bad habits in recent years”? The need to make myself sound better is probably a whole other blog post!) Writing regularly is one of them. I know that I know that I know that writing is good for my mental and spiritual health. But it takes time and intentionality and I’ve been choosing the easy road instead. And you know what? The scenery on this road is pretty crappy. It’s flat and boring. You know how you see the breathtaking vistas of valleys and hills and rolling farmland? You climb the frickin’ mountain. It’s hard. It’s sweaty. It’s riddled with moments of wanting to give up. But the view, the sense of accomplishment at the top? It’s worth the hardship of the journey.
I’ve been listening to a lot of teaching on words lately. Speaking things out. Over our own lives and the lives of those we love. Our words matter, this is something I’ve always known but that I’ve certainly not always lived. I’m starting a new habit. A good one. Each morning before I get out of bed I’ve been speaking out loud (ok, whispering because it feels kind of weird) some affirmations. The very first one is “This is the day the Lord has made; I WILL rejoice and be glad in it.” The emphasis on “will” is my own. And I emphasize it every.single.day. It’s an act of our will to rejoice and be glad. There is so so much to distract us and drag us down and steal our hope. I find myself sinking in the waves like Peter because I’ve taken my eyes off Jesus. It’s so easy to give in to despair.
Worship is my favorite part of Sunday morning. I most often sing with my eyes shut so I can focus on the words I’m singing to Jesus. And I most often cry because the words are so powerful and Jesus is so good. But sometimes I watch other people. Dear people whose stories I know. Hard stories. And I watch them sing with arms and faces lifted high. It’s a humbling experience and so encouraging. To know that there are people who have walked thru suffering like I’ve not known and they have chosen to stay close to Jesus.
Sometimes during worship there are words or phrases of a song that stand out to me and I try to jot them down for future reference.
“The only wise King”
“merciful and mighty”
“He knows my name”
“I will open up my heart and let the Healer set me free”
“You stay the same thru the ages”
“Worthy is the King who conquered the grave”
When I flip back thru my journal these are some of the words I see that I’ve wanted to remember. What if the writers of these songs had chosen instead to take the easy, flat, boring road and remained uninspired? What if they didn’t do the hard work of probing deep questions, wrestling with God and hardship? What if they chose to speak and write without hope?
Proverbs 18 tells us that “The tongue has the power of life and death”. It’s time I start living like I believe that.
Tara is an amazing mom, leader, cook and blog writer.
She tells it like it is. And she wants to help children in need. If you want to help children with her, check out our website WeHelpChildren.org or call 484-798-5989 to see how you can get involved. There’s a place for you!
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